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Sunday, August 30, 2009

A Policeman Testifies in Court

If you ever testify in court, you might wish you could have been as sharp as this policeman. He was being cross-examined by a defense attorney during a felony trial. The lawyer was trying to undermine the policeman's credibility. ..


Q: "Officer -- did you see my client fleeing the scene?"


A: "No sir. But I subsequently observed a person matching the description of the offender, running several blocks away."


Q: "Officer -- who provided this description?"


A: "The officer who responded to the scene."


Q: "A fellow officer provided the description of this so-called offender. Do you trust your fellow officers?"


A: "Yes, sir. With my life."


Q: "With your life? Let me ask you this then officer. Do you have a room where you change your clothes in preparation for your daily duties?"


A: "Yes sir, we do!"


Q: "And do you have a locker in the room?"


A: "Yes sir, I do."


Q: "And do you have a lock on your locker?"


A: "Yes sir."


Q: "Now why is it, officer, if you trust your fellow officers with your life, you find it necessary to lock your locker in a room you share with these same officers?"


A: "You see, sir -- we share the building with the court complex, and sometimes lawyers have been known to walk through that room."

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The courtroom erupted in laughter, and a prompt recess was called. The officer on the stand has been nominated for this year's "Best Comeback" Line -- I think he'll win.


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